DON’T LET THE PAST INTERRUPT YOUR FUTURE

“You look gorgeous as usual. Come on, you wake up and you’re hair is perfectly straight and you’re rocking golden cheeks. You’re being a little dramatic sweetheart.” I sneered back at Chelz.

She was right. Something else was bothering me that is making me seriously act out. “Is it that time of the month? ” I thought to myself and immediately check my womanlog. “No….then what the hell is it?”

For the last few months I’ve been feeling this twisting in my gut. The kind that is telling me I am purposefully holding myself back from success. I throw on my favorite long navy blue dress, grab my white cardigan and put on my favorite pair of beige stilettos. I just love God for making stilettos possible – my favorite instant inner beautifier.

“See you later love!” I yell back to Chelz as I grabbed my coffee and ran out the door.

Somewhere in my morning commute thoughts I got lost in the details of how my first meeting with Mr. Clark  was going to go. Truth was, I really didn’t know the direction he wanted to go with his business. Come to think of it, he didn’t even know where or what he wanted to do. There’s that feeling again deep in the pit of my stomach. It’s got the sound of insecurity with a motivated engine of fear.

“Maybe it was the fact that he’s some young twenties who hasn’t really experienced life so his vision is as-cue? Maybe it’s his personality trait being all scientific thinking that he needs a creative mentor to help inspire him? “ I loved the pre-meeting jargon in my head whether it’s positive or negative, it’s my courtroom with myself. I practice everything in my mind to avoid as little mortifying failure as possible.

“11th floor please.” I say with a smile.  It’s the hot English businessman  greeting me in an empty elevator.
He smelled so good and always wore suits that made me  think he would be the perfect cast as the guy in Fifty Shades of Grey.
“Morning Ms. Parker.” He flashes a smile at me that makes me weak-in-the-knees.
“Morning Mr. Grant.” I smiled and shook my head at his obvious flirtation that was working on me like a charm. He’s asked me out for the last five months since I’ve been working with Mr. Clark and I’ve sheepishly say no every time! Dating a CEO of his caliber was NOT in my playbook. I wouldn’t even knowhow to keep him interested in me except with this little elevator and coffee game we have going.
“So, how has your week been?” I turn and ask him as the elevator doors shut.
He runs his hands through his light brown hair.  ”I just got back from Hawaii for a weekend rendezvous for some rock climbing.” He transitions his coffee cup from his left to his right with a smooth yet swift motion. He put his left arm out to ask me how I was doing with a little physical touch. I don’t know what the hell is wrong with me to act so sheepish- but per usual, instead of enjoying the moment I count the seconds to get out of the elevator. But, yet I want to stay and just be around him.
“That’s me.” I look back and smile at him as we hit the 11th floor. I couldn’t fly out of that elevator fast enough. As usual, Mr. Grant stops the elevator and asks me to coffee.
“Beautiful Ms. Parker, will you join me in the courtyard say around one?” He reaches out his hand for mine to kiss it.  I commit, handing him my hand as he kisses it, smiles and allows the elevator to finally shut.

I have no idea how to handle him past 3 minute intervals. Shameless.

But I knew I had to make a move or this flirtation and coffee chat breaks were going to become non-existent.

“I’m totally going to hit on him today.” I tell myself for the 50th time in the last few weeks.

I take in a deep breath and start walking down to Mr. Clark’s office. The big cherry wood doors greet me at the end of the hallway.

“Good morning Lynz!” The 21 year old peppy receptionist greets me with another cup of coffee and my messages. Every Tuesday I work at Clark Corp to fill in areas of need as well as help Mr. Clark build a dynamic marketing strategy. Right now he’s invested in a plumbing company that we’re working on finishing up the full acquisition of the franchise ownership.  His acquisition has been going back and forth for 8 years, I have no idea why now all of a sudden things are moving forward faster than ever.

“Thank girl!” I throw some gun fingers towards her and tell her to have an awesome day. Routine.

“Lynz!” Breanne runs to my side with a portfolio with signatures needed in her hand.
“Walk with me.”
“Okay, listen – this is a great idea I promise, you’re so going to love this!” She sung out this for emphasis.
I laugh rewarding the weird behavior, smiling she continues as we enter the conference room for set up, “Okay. Imagine you are at a holiday party with all your family in the house and BAM plumbing issues. How many times does that happen? The overload of family in a not so big home with heavy traffic to the John is every host’s worst nightmare! The wives would remember this sort of commercial. Add in some hunks to play the plumbing cast and there you have it – a win for this campaign!” I laugh as she thrusts her fists in the air in excitement or maybe it’s domination – I can’t tell.
“Okay – I like it. Let me guess. Jen provided this idea didn’t she?” I asked with my brow raising at her.
Breanne smirks at me as she rolls her eyes, “Yes. But it’s just because it’s a good idea. I was actually surprised that she came up with it. I know you hate her, but please, consider it?”
“Why is this so important to you?”
“It’s what your firm is all about isn’t it? Success?” Breanne smiled at me.
I didn’t have anything to say in rebuttal. She left the folder with the idea on the conference table and left me to debate with myself.

The conference room was the best place in the entire office. It was the only room that had floor to ceiling windows. The conference table held 22 chairs with four-72inch flat screen Toshiba’s that came down from the ceiling to meet in the middle.  It reminded me of the basketball game monitor that hovers above the courts. Mr. Clark called it his Situation Room. 

The door open and there came in the Calvary: my team. I smile, “Thank God!”

All six highly elite members of my staff walked in. These six have been with me since day 1. Some of them were with me in previous companies before I even started my firm. They are family to me and I trust my creative impulses with them, and only them.

Josh, who is my charismatic extrovert who loved adventure was the rock of my team. His personality was, “The Doer” and that he was great at. Any single task I said out loud, he’d insist on taking it on.  I should also mention that he’s the ladies man of the group and my best salesman. His opinion mattered the most. I gave him the folder of the idea from Jen and asked for an evaluation after the meeting.  He understood profit, and when my emotions stood in the way, I made sure I had an objective eye to help me realize potential.

My Clark’s assistant Jessi walked in huffing and puffing, “Lynz Parker! We need you desperately!”
Giving Josh the go-ahead to talk about what’s in the folder I ran off with Jessi to see what was the emergency.

“I don’t really know what’s gotten into him! He won’t move Lynz!” I stopped Jessi’s convulsing body in excited hyperventilation.
“Breathe. In….and out….” She practiced with me as she finally calmed down. “What’s going on?”
She looked up at me with her doe eyes, “I think his wife is asking for a divorce.”
“Shit.”
“I know. He’s kind of losing it. He wants to sell the company.”
I turn from facing the window trying to find a solution in the clouds, “Say that again?”
Jessi gulped, “He wants to sell the company.”
Furious, I stomp towards his office and yank the doors open, “Mr. Clark!” Jessi behind me shuts the doors behind us to avoid commotion.  I had a tendency of losing my lid with clients who just love to throw all their hard work out the door when it came to love lost. Believe it or not, business owners are people too.

Out from the bathroom with tears in his eyes is Mr. Clark and accompanying him is a bottle of scotch. His tie is thrown over his shoulder as he stumbles toward me.
“She wants it all!” He yells in a drunken stoop.
“Marie doesn’t want it all. ” I try to minimize the problem to speak to his intellectual side – somewhere in there the right words will require him to sober up quick. I start rummaging the office for anything that would lead me to see another emotional blow up, like a receipt. Marie had a tendency to cheat. I caught her on a few “errands” Mr. Clark wanted me to go on – and we have the proof, there would be no way she could take it all. There was something else.
“Jessi can you get him to sit down here please?” As Jessi gathered Mr. Clark I rummaged through the stack of papers on his leather bound office chair. There it was. A letter from Marie.  I shake the letter in front of Mr. Clark’s face seeing if the sober glare comes through. His eyes widened and I could see the emotion hit his mental cortex in a way that sobered him up fast.
He shook his head at me, “That’s mean.” He says pointing at the letter. I try not to burst into laughter. Mr. Clark was a very serious personality. I enjoyed the sometimes three hour long conversations we would have about the value of life and the off topics about death. But, there was something very unapologetic real about him lately that has been growing since we started working together.
I sat down next to him as Jessi went to get us both coffee. I looked at him. The same look I take in before I lay down some truth. I take my gifts seriously. I can read people and I believe a gift like that should be treated with massive respect. I already know how what I’m about to say will crush him. I can predict the next two weeks of his behavior after these next five minutes are up. So, I need to level with him. I didn’t know what he wanted to do with his business anyway, so I have very little to go on with our truth talk. In these cases, I can’t sugar coat – so, I just go with my gut.

I place my hand on his shoulder, anchoring him into this moment, “Rob, it’s time for you to move on.” I pause and notice he turns away. I take a deep breath, “This is a moment in your life where you’re being faced at the crossroads. We face the crossroads in so many areas of our life, but now more than ever, you’re being called to make a decision that will change your entire life. Whatever decision you decide willaffect all that encompasses your life. You love  life and your business life will be different. Now, you can be ready for that or you can sulk and drink your decision away. Whatever you decide from this moment is going to affect you. That is a very real reality.”

“What should I do?” He turned to me with a look that made the hair on my neck stand straight. He was terrified. I’m not sure what Marie has on him.

“Well, what I would do if I were in your shoes would be to turn in everything I gathered from the private investigator to the pictures you have of Marie cheating. Chances are she has no idea she has been spotted. She’s a cheater! I mean my gosh, you’re going so easy on her.” Rob let out a little laugh and a half smile started to crack. I continued, “Then I’d move out all her stuff – in fact, I’d hire people to move her out and into her mom’s house in the next few hours. Then, I’d make some serious decisions about an investment I recently made that will bring in more profit. Then, I’d have some scotch while I purchase my plane tickets to Figi.”  Rob turned to me and flashed me a smile so big it made me reflect one right back. His face illuminated and it was as if his once terrified ghost white face moments ago was transformed into a face ready to take on challenge.

“Thank you Lynz! You are worth every penny!” Rob hopped over the chair and gave me a bear hug so tight I think my ribs were crushed.
“Okayyyyy! Yeah! Let’s go!” I pump my fist in the air encouraging the excitement awkwardly.
“It’s like your rule – don’t let the past interrupt your future! Don’t waste time!” The very excited rob skipped around his office packing up work to take home.
I nod back at him and figure the day is over today. “I’ll come by your place in a few hours?”
“Yes! Sounds awesome!” This over-excitement is usually a sign of crash later – I knew in a few hours I could get work done so I left him to his demise. Jessi was the best babysitter for him and often she spent the most time helping him through his emotional duress.

I looked at the clock, it was almost time to meet Mr. Grant.
My stomach turned at the idea of how I was going to ask him out. I needed to appear confident even though it would be coming from the 15 year old girl inside of me. I really didn’t know what I was going to do, but I was motivated to do something. I was reminded of my own rule today for a reason.